is hard to make decision ....

i tot i am very good in leading, thinking, with a cool mind ... however, facts show that i'm not !!!

i hate making decision, i'm not afraid that i will make the wrong one, but i'm afraid that i am not making the best one ... i'm afraid that the decision or choices that i've make will bring even bigger impact than the 1 that i didn't...

SL told me that i should think more for myself but not others, i know the theory, but i just don't want to lose my friend... perhaps not now ... mayb when im about to finish my degree ???

but i've tried hard to stay calm, control my temper as well as be cool although i'm freaking angry !!!

but people do not understand what they've done !!!

THEY ARE NOT !!! TOTALLY NOT !!!

maybe some friends are good when having fun, but not when having trouble, what called in chinese "有福可以同享,有难不能同当" ... i understand this sentences so well !!! do choices reli nid sacrifice ???? i'm exhausted ... for all the things, may be i've made the wrong decision at 1st ... my temper reli make me in trouble !!!

oh god !!! can u just shoot me ?!! i dunwanna think !!! i got no courage to tell them what i want actually ..... i nid 2 plan b4 i make dis decision .!.. seriously !!!

anyone can tell me how 2 do? i reli got no idea !!!!!

感叹...

过去的不会再回来.....

Ex-Utarian ~~~

29th of December 2010 ... I met up with Ella Khoo, Bibi, SuetMei & of coz My houzmate -- Louise, Veonna,Kelly & AhMok ...

it has been almost 2 years i never meet up with Ella, Bibi & SuetMei !!!

wahahahha...im so excited de moment i saw Ella !!! she has changed a little bit... become slimmer, more feminine ... haha !!! I reli miss her !!

yo!!! 2years later, finally we met up !!! miss you sooooooooo Much !!!

Bibi still looks great ... & she keeps on talking sweet words(a Good Liar) ... hahahaha ...

one of the latecomers(Louise!!(left)) & Veonna (dressed up nice)

we had our lunch at GuXiang (a korean restaurant) ... and i had my Lunch wit Bi Bim Bap as shown in the picture !!! hahaha... i & Ella took de same ... but she said it was suxxx !!!

looks great !!! but taste, ....... ok ok la ...

actualli it was not bad la, if it is abit more salty, abit more sour, abit more yummy ... kakakaka ...

what i was surprised was ---- Ella played Wedding Dress at the musical instrument shop ~~~ woohoo!!! it was GREAT & AWESOME !!!! the 1st time i hear it in Live ~~~ woah ! im regretting why i din ask my dad to bring me to piano class last time ... Ella played it so well ... & i fall in love to her dat moment !!!! hahahaha !!

she brought me alot of surprises ..... She got a bf !!!!! & out of 6, there are 3 who in Love ~~~ how sweet ... Ella, i wish you all de best & sweet sweet love wif ur bf ... hahaha

She asked us for the CNY visiting to her houz ... but i cant promise her yet, as i dont know whether there are any plans from Papa... haha..but if i can make it i will make it ... hehehe...

had fun wif all dis ladies~~~ chat,crap,walk,bilibala ~~~ memorable outing for me ....

My DreamLand ~~

oh oh oh oh !!! before i forget, this few days i keep dreaming good dreams ... wahahahahaha.... those who appeared in my dreams, all i love ~~~

few few days ago, i dreamed that i & pei wuen went to Park Jung Min's fans'meeting ... woohoo !!! crowded !!! but ... our JungMin oppa only concentrate on us !!! wahahaha(wat a good sign), he asking for my present on my hands, but i duno why i replied him dat it was not him, den he jz keep talking wif the 2 of us, & ignore others fans, those fans just passing by lk dat... the 3 of us sit beside & just keep talking talking non-stop, he is great & awesome !!! v talk & laugh like friends... woah !!! is was a Great & Awesome dream !!!

and then, few days ago, i dreamed that duno when & where i met HyunJoong on the street, den he brought me to his company, we just keep talking on the road, it was great, becoz oli 2 of us this time ... duno why, i understand wat he said, and he understand my poor korean as well (i dun reli rmb i was talking in korean or not)... then we reached his company .... the other were there too !!! ParkJungMin, KimHyungJun, KimKyuJong & HeoYoungSaeng .... they all welcome me !! hahahaha !! so great !!! JungMin even took photos wif me !! & they just treat me like their friends, so friendly... Tom & Jerry keep making noise, HyunJoong went for make-up ... i dun rmb wat KyuJong & YoungSaeng did... but !!! one of their manager chased me to get out, he said dat fans are not allowed here !! im so so so angry !!! they all kept silent, HyunJoong came out & say sorry, he told me 2 stay there & dun bother bout his manager ~~~~ so warm !!!! woah !! how great if my dreams really comes true ???? i cant imagine it !!!

today & yesterday i dreamed too !!!! but i cant rmb any little pieces scenes of 1 of the dreams ..... im wishing that i can dream again 2nite ... i wanna make a collection if my dreams if i can rmb it ~~~ walalalallaa ~~~

Sweet Dreams ~~~~~ GoodNight ~~~~~~